Today I Wore Pants to Church

Last Sunday I wore dressy trousers to church, but it was Stake Conference and we ended up sitting in a nearly-empty overflow room. I was nervous, but no one really saw me. Having an easy first time helped me to get over my nerves about wearing pants to church and I did it again today in my ward.

My ward really surprised me. No one commented on my gray pants, though I did get one dirty look and a primary leader was visibly startled when she saw my pants. But no one commented. I'm sure there will be some gossip about it, but I'm hoping it will quickly become a non-issue. I plan to continue wearing pants to church.

As I've thought about it these last few months, there are lots of reasons why I want to wear pants to church. Here are some of those reasons, in no particular order.

Reason: I teach a class in junior primary (currently the 5 year olds) and we do a lot of activities on the floor. Wearing a skirt or dress is impractical. There is a reason that you never see preschool, kindergarten, or first grade teachers wearing skirts or dresses in this day and age. It just doesn't work.

Reason: I don't actually like wearing skirts or dresses, unless it is too hot to wear anything else comfortably. I only ever wear skirts or dresses for church. I really dislike tights/pantyhose and so when I wear skirts or dresses, my legs are bare and then I freeze in the winter. I'm an adult and I can make my own clothing choices.

Reason: The purpose of Wear Pants to Church last December was to raise awareness about the pain that some women and men feel over gender inequality in the LDS church. I know that not all LDS women feel pain over this issue and that is fine. I feel this pain and I want to raise awareness about gender inequality. I didn't wear pants last December. I didn't yet have nice dress pants and I had the flu on the actual day, but I am wearing them now.

Reason: In 2013, women can dress up and still be wearing pants. I'm not quite sure when or how this cultural shift happened during the last century, but it did. I googled "when did women start wearing pants" and got a poorly cited wikipedia article and a bunch of websites addressing whether or not the Bible says its ok for women to wear pants. I think this is a little ridiculous, because I get the impression that just about everyone in the Bible wore a long tunic or dress. If Western society dealt with men wearing pants to church hundreds of years ago, we can cope with women wearing pants in the twenty-first century.

Reason: In wearing pants to church, I am not breaking any church rules. If my pants offend anyone, I am offending their sense of cultural propriety, but not church policy or doctrine. I've seen Scottish men and boys wear kilts to church and I've seen Polynesian men and boys wear lava-lava to church. If Mormons can find a way to cope with skirted men, surely we can do the same with trousered women.

Cross-posted at http://nickelonthenacle.blogspot.com/

2 Nephi 7: The Importance of Asking Questions

Jacob continues to preach from Isaiah 50. It is a short chapter that that starts off by using the voice of God to condemn the people for turning away from him (v. 1-3). The rest of the chapter is in Isaiah's voice, spoken through Jacob, who identifies with Isaiah.

Isaiah/Jacob talks about the things that he has received from God to help him be a prophet. "The Lord God hath given me the tongue of the learned, that I should know how to speak a word in season unto thee, O house of Israel" (v. 4). "The Lord God hath opened my ear, and I was not rebellious, neither turned away back" (v. 5). "For the Lord God will help me, therefore I shall not be confounded" (v. 7). "And the Lord is near, and he justifieth me" (v. 8). "For the Lord God will help me" (v. 9).

I find it a little strange that Jacob is preaching about how much God is helping him and justifying him. I understand these statements in the context is journal writing and record keeping, but when these things are part of a sermon, I'm a little confused. "I was not rebellious" models the behavior that Jacob wants others to follow, but the other statements are included to justify the speaker's power over others. I am uncomfortable with this kind of persuasion because it is too forceful. It is as if Jacob is saying "God is watching me/us right now, and he approves this message". It would be the kind of sermon an experienced or overbearing leader would give. It is not hard to see that Jacob takes some of his cues from Nephi, who never seemed to realize when he was being overbearing.

The reason that this makes me uncomfortable is that there isn't much room for personal growth or spiritual development when a leader insists on being followed or their language is too manipulative. I believe in following my church leaders, but I also believe that I can draw a line and think for myself. I'm allowed to ask questions. Yesterday I read this article over at Modern Mormon Men about this very issue. The whole of Mormonism is founded on the question of a teenage boy, and I really love that. Joseph Smith earnestly sought an answer and he got one, but not the one he expected. I wish that we had a culture of encouraging questions in our church, instead of seeing them as faithless.

When I think of good questions that have been asked in the church and their positive results, I think about the lifting of the priesthood ban in 1978, the lowering of the missionary age in 2012, and the new edition of the scriptures that was announced yesterday. Some of the changes in the new edition are discussed in this article over at BCC, but they boil down to placing scriptural statements in a clearer historical framework. As an (art) historian, I think that this is a big positive change. I'm looking forward to comparing the chapter headings of some of the racism Book of Mormon chapters in the old and new versions. The church is moving in the direction of more openness with regard to our (often difficult) history and I applaud these efforts. Keep asking those questions!

Cross-posted at http://nickelonthenacle.blogspot.com

2 Nephi 2:6 Baroque-Style Drama

Cross-posted over at Nickel on the 'Nacle 

This chapter records Jacob's preaching. Jacob was still very young while they crossed the sea in a ship, and is perhaps a young adult by this point. He indicates that he was ordained by Nephi and not by Lehi (v. 2). He also mentions that the people look to Nephi as a king (v. 2). Jacob references previous preaching and it seems like he might be Nephi's protege (v. 3). Jacob is interested in Isaiah and says that he is reading to the people from that prophet's text (vv. 4 and 5). My guess is that Jacob is reading from the original brass plates and not a copy, though I guess there might be a copy on a roll or on other plates. Codices aren't in use at this time and their (perhaps) only model book is on plates of brass.

Jacob talks about bringing together of the Jews and the Gentiles (vv. 6-7). "Thou shalt know that I am the Lord; for they shall not be ashamed that wait for me" (v. 7). This verse stands out to me at this moment in my life. Periodically, and increasingly frequently these days, I become frustrated about gender issues in the church. And sometimes this frustration turns into anger and I start to lose my perspective. 

This past weekend was one of those times. I made a decision in the middle of last week to start wearing pants/trousers to church. I was all geared up for nasty comments and minor pants-related drama, but that's not what happened. My husband reminded my late on Saturday that the following morning was Stake Conference, not regular church. I got up on Sunday morning, got the girls ready, put on my nicest (new) dress pants, and we headed out. We arrived just as it was starting and headed into an overflow room where the conference in the chapel was being broadcast via tv. It is easier for the girls if we're not in the same room with five hundred other people. For half an hour or so, we were the only ones in that little side room. No dramas, no comments on my dress pants. The girls were well-behaved as they read books, wrote and drew pictures in their journals, and played silently on the iPads. The opening talk grated on my feminist sensibilities, but I was particularly surprised by the thoughtfulness of the last two talks, which were genuinely helpful as I was trying to work through this frustration that had boiled over into real anger. 

The two talks discussed things like slowing down and savoring the good in our lives, avoiding extremes, and finding greater patience. All three of these things related to the anger I was feeling and offered me a way through my intense feelings. Trying to change the direction of my thoughts wasn't about trying to forget my frustration with gender issues or pretending they don't exist, but trying to regain peace of mind and a sense of perspective. 

It is easy to get carried away with a single issue. The development of this story, which played out in Facebook group and on LDS blogs, pushed one of my buttons. Stories like this make me want to shake my hands at the heavens, like Mary Magdelene in this painting (detail from Caravaggio's Entombment, 1602-03),

and yell "Why, oh, why, Heavenly Parents, are we dealing with this nonsense in 2013?" You can almost see Mary Magdelene asking this.

When the conference speaker quoted 2 Nephi 6:7 "Thou shalt know that I am the Lord; for they shall not be ashamed that wait for me", I was able to remember that, for better or worse, waiting is an important part of this. I feel that I've had numerous spiritual confirmations that change will come, but I know that the pace of change will be slow. But it will come. But it will be slow. It will come. It will be slow. Deep breath. Patience. 

Anyone interested in reviving this blog?

When we started this blog, I wasn't ready to be a blogger, but things have changed for me in the last few months and I've been blogging the Book of Mormon over at http://nickelonthenacle.blogspot.com/. But that blog is just me and I'm interested in engaging in more of a conversation, particularly since Pants and Let Women Pray. I think that Pants particularly is a turning point for Mormon feminism and I'm interested in how others see these events and view Mormon feminism. Are up up for it?

Some Continued Thoughts on Modesty

Thinking back to prior posts about modesty (like this one), I thought this blog post and article on modesty (both by the same author) would add to the discussion, particularly with regard to how teaching modesty through the eyes of men objectifies women. Enjoy. Here is a teaser:

"[Modesty] also defined my relationship with men as one of predator and prey. It was my job to hide from men so that their sex drive would lie dormant, like a sleeping wolf. But if that wolf ever awakened, it was not because it had been sleeping for a long time and its circadian rhythm kicked in, or it was just naturally hungry. It was my fault because I had done something to “bait” the wolf. Just by being visibly female, or by moving in “unladylike” ways. You cannot consider women full human beings unless you recognize that their lives do not revolve around the male sex drive."

to everything there is a season

Hi friends,

I had an enlightening conversation today with a friend who is currently juggling work, school, motherhood and several big life decisions. This talk by Elder Faust came up in our conversation. You are already great women in my eyes, but seeing as some of you also juggle children, careers, etc., I thought I'd share this link in hopes it might bring you good cheer!

http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=3e23ef960417b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD

"...you cannot do everything well at the same time. You cannot be a 100 percent wife, a 100 percent mother, a 100 percent church worker, a 100 percent career person, and a 100 percent public-service person at the same time. How can all of these roles be coordinated? Says Sarah Davidson: “The only answer I come up with is that you can have it sequentially. At one stage you may emphasize career, and at another marriage and nurturing young children, and at any point you will be aware of what is missing. If you are lucky, you will be able to fit everything in. Doing things sequentially—filling roles one at a time at different times—is not always possible, as we know, but it gives a woman the opportunity to do each thing well in its time and to fill a variety of roles in her life. The Book of Ecclesiastes says: “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.”

Kat

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